LGBT parenting blog Mombian, which received a GLAAD Media Award for Outstanding Blog, is taking Monday, June 3rd to show the world for the 8th year in a row that LGBT families are just as loving, supportive and valuable to our communities as straight families. Mombian is asking LGBT families, straight allies and all other supporters to write and submit to mombian.com, a blog post on any topic relating to LGBT families.
"Hi my name is Hannah and I have two moms."
This is how I usually introduce myself. I've done it since I was little. My moms tell me that they heard my classmates in preschool ask their dads: "why don't I have two mommies like Hannah?" Poor dads. Even in situations where my moms might not have chosen to be out, I outed them. After I was born, they could no longer step into and out of the closet when the situation called for it. I was out and proud on their behalf all the time.
At a summer writing program I once attended, we were asked to write 6 word biographies as introductions. I wrote "My lesbian moms run my life" (okay, they don't really, but when you're between your junior and senior years in high school it can sometimes feel like it). The next person to go had a similar theme: "writer, lesbian, student who loves orange." Later in the day, a girl approached me.
She looked at me with intensely blue eyes as she quietly asked, "What was it like? Growing up with lesbian moms?"
I smiled, "I loved it! What do you want to know? Because there's a lot."
"Well," she said, "I'm gay and I just want to know what my own kids' lives might be like one day!"
I use my introduction as a welcome mat. It is incredible how much more relaxed people become once they know there's an ally in the room. This is particularly true of people who are just starting to come out, but even people who have been out for a while.
I also use it as a warning sign. If you believe all gay people are going hell, we probably can't be friends. I struggle to tolerate someone who believes that my gay grandfather lived in sin and that my moms, aunts and LGBT friends are following in his footsteps.
I also use it as an invitation. Never met anyone who was raised by the gay community? Let's talk. I'll tell you why my family and yours are not so different, except that my parents have the same name (Cheryl), which is much less likely if you've got a mom and a dad. Think that kids who wave rainbow flags as they march in pride parades are being forced to do so by their lgbt parents or don't understand what they're marching for? I'll tell you how, even at 20 years old, I still want to wave that flag (plus we can discuss how awesome little kids find rainbows to be). Just want to be assured that LGBT people can be just as great parents as straight people? I'll tell you how I've received all the love and support I could ever have hoped for.
I will never stop being out and proud about my family. My moms are no longer a couple and my mama has another partner (so I actually have three moms!). People keep telling me that one day it won't be unusual or surprising, that LGBT people will be having more and more kids. As part of the early wave of kids born to same-sex couples, though, I hope to blaze a trail for all the queerspawn who are on their way.