LGBT parenting blog Mombian, which received a GLAAD Media Award for Outstanding Blog, is taking Monday, June 3rd to show the world for the 8th year in a row that LGBT families are just as loving, supportive and valuable to our communities as straight families. Mombian is asking LGBT families, straight allies and all other supporters to write and submit to mombian.com, a blog post on any topic relating to LGBT families.
Just last week, Liberty Counsel personality and Liberty University professor Matt Barber said this about gay parents and our reasoning for parenting:
"It's parents—not parents—it's homosexuals who can't, through the natural biological process, have children trying to acquire children. They're basically purchasing children. It's like having little pets or something, I guess. It's ego-centric, it's selfish, and it hurts children." [SOURCE]
This echoes something that the National Organization For Marriage's Christopher Plante said a few years back. To wit:
"[Same-sex marriage] turns children into little teacup dogs. It's an accessory to put in my purse." [SOURCE]
The obvious attempt is to make gay parents sound frivolous, at best. At worst, it is downright demonization of these many loving adults who dedicate their lives to their children. I'll let you decide how generous you want to be.
And then there's Bryan Fischer, whose view deserves deep contemplation. When this prominent American Family Association staffer suggested that we need some sort of Underground Railroad to "rescue" kids from gay parents, he left little room for debate about what exactly he meant. When he followed up with the claim the Penn State's Jerry Sandusky tragedy and scandal means that "we are not going to put children in same-sex households" and that gay people should only be allowed "supervised visits" with children," the needle for how far they will go to attack us moved just a little more to the fringe.
But don't be fooled: it's not just the outspoken fringe. Over the past year or so, we've see groups like the National Organization For Marriage try with all of its organizational muscle to turn Mark Regnerus' flawed research on families into an outright repudiation of the notion of gay parenting. Hiding behind what they wrongly claim to be sound data, NOM and its willing allies essentially assert that gay parents will hurt our children. NOM's Jennifer Roback Morse even used Regnerus' research as basis to to publicly state that children of gays will grow up and ask of their parents: "What were you thinking!?!" That is a truly cold prediction to put out into the world, but it is the kind of thing that catches easy heat on the anti-LGBT side.
Then there's NOM's own president, Brian Brown, who, in the wake of multiple advancements of marriage equality, has equated our families with families that have been touched or even torn apart by divorce and/or death:
"It's bad enough when families break down through divorce or death, but it's unconscionable when a state encourages this through policies that deprive children of the love of both a mother and a father." [SOURCE]
I honestly can't even fathom saying any of these kinds of things about even my most vocal opponents or their children. Even on my worst day (like the day after Prop 8 passed, for instance), I wouldn't have gone after Brian Brown's children. Doing so is not within my capacity as a human person.
To me, these attacks on our families really do show how fully our opposition wants to hurt us and how fully they hope our neighbors will see us as something other than we are. I think more than just about anything the "pro-family" crowd says or does about us, their denigrations of our families and worth as parents are among the harshest, most offensive, and most deserving of denouncing. Their cruel slights have the ability to do considerable damage to society's most vulnerable members.
Which brings me to today, which happens to be Mombian's annual "Blogging for LGBT Families Day." I love to participate in this event because as a gay man and prospective parent, I know how important it is to stand up for the worth and welfare of our parents, children, and supportive relatives. We all know that the single best thing we can do to advance equality is to simply share our stories. On this day, we get to do that en masse.
But there's another reason why I think it's important. Namely, because so many people spend so much time writing, activating, organizing, and generally stirring up animus against our families. I cited some examples above, but they are just a very few. It took me about fifteen minutes to assemble the examples in the preceding paragraphs; if I took the full day, I could surely fill a short book. Attacking our families has become the anti-LGBT movement's way to attack all of our rights. They believe that if they make us seem dangerous to children then they can win over those in the middle and stall or even roll back our gains. They think that if they can raise enough doubts, then even would-be supporters will see us as too risky to support. They have an agenda and they are engaging in a full-court press to sell it to the public. Sometimes it's subtle (see NOM) and sometimes it's overt (see Bryan Fischer), but it's a real thing. It's a decided-upon political tactic.
I, for one, am not willing to let these anti-LGBT commentators gain even one inch of the ground they seek. We stand up for LGBT families because the threats against our families are as constant as they are shocking.